Wednesday, December 14, 2011

A dream is a wish your heart makes?

I just woke up (with a start, I might add) from a work dream I've never had before.
The diner was short on cash and about to be closed down.
So the cooks all stripped for money.....

Now there's maybe one I wouldn't mind seeing in his birthday suit, but most of these guys are total trolls. Thank god my brain had the decency to blur out the naughty bits.

What is wrong with me?! Finals are getting to me.
What's your craziest restaurant dream?

Monday, December 12, 2011

Cooks are jerks, aka The Gods were smiling down on me last night.

We have one family that comes in. Mom, dad, son about 16-17. If just the dad and son come in, they are awful. Condescending, needy, subpar tippers. It drives all us servers nuts to be talked to like that by someone 5, 10, 20 years younger.
But if either of the two come in with the mom, they are quiet and respectful, if not even friendly. The mother is sweet as pie and they tip better. I had the mother and son last night, which is why I was the luckiest little waitress - the cooks screwed up their order beyond comprehension.
The son always orders "A bacon burger, just bacon, burger, and bun." No cheese, no tomato, no coleslaw, no pickle. French fries and bacon hamburger. I get the mom's order as well.

I take the order out to the table. As I'm setting down the burger, I realize with horror the cooks put cheese on the bun. I immediately say, "Oh my goodness, they put cheese on it, I should have checked, I'm so sorry!"
They both tell me, "Oh, it's not your fault, this happens all the time!"
I tell them they can just switch out the bun, I'll have it back out in two seconds.
"No," he tells me, "I need a whole new burger. I can't have any cheese."
Okay, that's fine, let's be on the safe side. I take it back and tell the cooks they need to READ my checks, and now I need a whole new burger. The one insane cook I've written about before scrapes off the cheese and throws the old burger back on the grill.
"No, no, no - I need a NEW PATTY. This guy cannot have cheese."
"It's fine, no cheese, it's fine."
"No, it's not fine. You made the order wrong, now you're going to make it right. I want a completely new order."
I stood there and watched until I was sure I was getting a new patty. It comes up pretty quickly for a medium burger, and I take it back out. They call me back almost immediately.
"Please don't hate us, but this burger is rare."
"Oh my god. I'm sorry. They were trying to get it out too quickly and didn't cook it enough. Let me take it back, I'm so sorry."
They tell me again it's not my fault, and I take the burger back a second time. The cooks curse and rant and rave, etc. etc., but they do it. I take the burger out again, and tell him to cut into it to make sure before I even leave the table. As he cuts into it, we see the bottom bun. It's soaked in blood from the raw burger, and he looks at me. "I'll get you a new bun."
I have to go back in the kitchen. I have them toast me a new bun. I take it out, apologize once more, and we're finally good to go.

So, by the time he can actually eat his meal, I've had to go back to the kitchen three times. His mom is halfway through her meal. I understand trying to get orders out quickly, but not at the cost of quality. They cost the restaurant three buns, two patties, and mine and the customers' time because they were trying to cut corners. And at the end of the meal, I got the burger taken off the check because it was just ridiculous. The table, again, was wonderful, told me it wasn't my fault, asked if I was sure, etc.

Sigh. I'm going to tell my boss today, because this cook is getting out of hand. He hates his job and just doesn't care. I can't imagine how much our food costs have gone up since he came in. If he can't read the ticket, he makes whatever the hell he feels like, which ends up being thrown away.

Friday, December 2, 2011

Increasingly bad blonde moments....

I keep saying 'ohemgee when I get home I'm totes going to blog about that' and I keep forgetting.

But allow me to elaborate on a tale that happened the day after my last post, and was eerily similar. For some reason, people seem to look at me and think, "hey, this 20-something looks like she makes all the business decisions for this restaurant. Let's berate her for the things we don't agree with."

So, at my diner, like most, we give rolls with dinners.
Side note: doesn't it seem like most of the people you give them to don't eat it, and then when you don't for some reason, they get really indignant and HAVE to have the damn bread?
Anyway. We give rolls/cornbread with the soups and salad. On our dinner menu, it states that you can replace that with garlic bread if you choose. I don't normally point this out, as many of our regulars know this and it's, you know, right there.
I have two ladies order lasagna with salads. I bring out their salads and rolls, and when dinner comes, they request more rolls. I happily oblige, so far they have been pleasant and normal.
When I do my check-back, one asks if we have any garlic bread. I say, "sure, I can bring you some!"
Check time comes. I charged them for the entrees, the drinks, and the garlic bread because they had ordered it separately.
When I cash them out, the one who ordered the garlic bread says to me, "You know, I have to complain about something. Garlic bread should come free with Italian dinners."
Uhm. "Well, ma'am, you can replace the original rolls and cornbread with the garlic bread if you'd like, but you two had extra rolls in addition to that, so I had to charge you for something."
"Well, it SHOULD come with it when you order lasagna and spaghetti and such."
"Okay, ma'am. You know for next time, you can order it in advance and not be charged."

WTF? They got rolls. They got EXTRA rolls. They didn't ask for garlic bread until halfway through their meal, expected it to be free, and scolded me for.. I don't know, doing my job and charging people appropriately?

At least they didn't stiff me.