Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Please don't store my body parts in jars.

I have missed you all!
If you are curious about my non-waitressing life, I'm starting school again in one week and I am nervous as hell to be back on campus. I've been spending way too much time at the pool and maybe too much time in the bars. I have a new love interest, I think this one is sticking around. Help me think of a nickname! I have one in mind, but it's extremely embarrassing.

Today, I'm going to write about the Navy Man. The Navy Man is a total creep, and all waitresses (and I'm sure waiters too) will recognize the picture I'm going to put in your head.
He's short-ish, maybe 5'7". Late 50's maybe. Average looking dude, might even be semi-attractive if he were taller and not so damn creepy. The kind of person that watches you as you perform your other tasks. The kind of person that wants to know your name and uses it excessively. The kind of person you can feel undressing you with their eyes.
Just a few examples of the weird things he has done to me personally:
  • I experimented with red lipstick one day, he told me I was beautiful when I got done up and said I looked like a 'true American girl.' Oh, okay.
  • Asked me if I had been on vacation after a few sessions in the tanning salon, when I asked, "oh, do I look tanner?" He just gave me a creepy smile and a weird laugh. Uhm...
  • Told me he dated a girl while in the Navy with the same name as I. Told me she used to write to him and drive him crazy, telling him about the short skirts she would wear and how all the guys would look at her, while eyeing up at my legs. 
  • Brought me in a picture of his ex-wife and told me she comes in the diner a lot, said he saw her there with the man she left him for. 
  • Countless uncomfortable eye contact and general staring.
I can't bring to mind the weird stuff the other girls have told me, but.. terrifying, right? Gives you the feeling he's going to take you home and wear your skin like Buffalo Bill. 


  1. Oh I reallllllly hate when people use your name excessively. If you ever want to guest post about your love interest on www.every-single-day.com let me know! I'd be honored :)

    Take care!

    1. Thank you! I was just reading your latest post and thinking about all the times my friends and I have said, 'Oh, we should write a book!' after a bad date, so I might have to take you up on that!